My love story will be different…It won’t be a “married to my high school sweetheart” story. It won’t be a “rocky marriage and reconciliation” story. It won’t be a “happily ever after right after divorce” story. No, my love story will be different.
My love story will be learning about how much God loves me, even in the midst of painful losses and rejections. My love story will be learning to love myself in the midst of them to0. Learning to love myself even when made to feel unlovable. Learning to love myself after being torn down to a nub by men in my life. Learning that not all men and women are the same….
Right after my divorce, I fell hard for a guy. He gave me more attention that I’d ever received from my ex-husband. We dated over a year, but he refused to commit. So, heartbroken again, I knew I had to stop the rollercoaster of not knowing what he wanted from me. Cue the next few guys who wanted to marry me after our first date. And some even before. What was going on?!?
One on parole and two more with mental issues…The fear of God set in.
What was a single mom with two daughters to do? Just stop? Or keep trying, trusting God. I chose the latter……My love story will be different.
The only way I could trust God with my romantic life after these stories was IF I loved Him enough and trusted His love for me. I can’t tell you how many times, I’ve cried out, thinking it won’t happen for me. It just can’t after these stories…
The fear would be too great or the rug would be yanked out from under me, again.
I’ve split over spiritual beliefs. I’ve dated guys recommended by friends. What was going on?!? None of it was easy…
My love story will be different….God will be my first love.
My love story will be an open book of the love WE share. I will run to Him when I hurt. I will lean on Him when I’m scared. I will share who He is to me. I will trust Him with my life. And, if it turns out that He just wants me all to Himself, my love story will be complete.
I will live to please and honor Him all the days of my life. The One who knows me best (every fear, every story, every option) and loves me most..
This is my story and He is my song.